You never particularly liked Victor Hugo. Thought he was too “grandiose” in his maudlinness. Though you had to admit there… Read more Maison de Victor Hugo
At Fashion’s Funeral
“He was such a genius.” “Such. No one will ever replace him.” “I heard he made arrangements to have his… Read more At Fashion’s Funeral
Hope You Find Comfort In Your Art, He Said, Hope You Find Comfort in Being A Sociopath, She Returned
There exist many types of men, and yet, ultimately just one: the kind who leaves. But within that category are,… Read more Hope You Find Comfort In Your Art, He Said, Hope You Find Comfort in Being A Sociopath, She Returned
Romance Scams
People asked her what she was planning for Valentine’s Day, as though she didn’t indulge herself every single day like… Read more Romance Scams
The Quondam Condom User
“I used to use them,” he says sheepishly as a means of justification, further digging his grave of insensitivity by… Read more The Quondam Condom User
I’m Not Hair
“You mean when I see you after, you’ll be like a totally different person?” Cameron asked with almost vexing incredulity.… Read more I’m Not Hair
The Day the Music Wouldn’t Stop
The day I went deaf was the day I lost and gained everything. Well, maybe I should specify that it… Read more The Day the Music Wouldn’t Stop
Fairway Worker on Super Bowl Weekend
“What’s a…a…a…pep…or…ohn…see…nee?” At long last, this dumb bitch gets her words out. And she is, most definitely, a dumb bitch.… Read more Fairway Worker on Super Bowl Weekend
Polak Persuasion
“Are you a Polish person?” she finally asks point blank, breaking the ice after his judgmental stare at her borscht… Read more Polak Persuasion
Spanx on a Pregnant Woman
Spanx on a pregnant woman. Like a crop top on an old person. It just doesn’t work, highlights a certain… Read more Spanx on a Pregnant Woman
