Monroe is informed almost weekly of every milestone he ever experienced with his ex-girlfriend. It’s been four years since they… Read more Your Memories on Facebook (Will Fucking Kill You)
Month: March 2017
Ghosts of Sexual Encounters Past
Charles Dickens may have described the ghost of Ebenezer Scrooge’s past to be rather a terrifying sort of phantasm–“being now… Read more Ghosts of Sexual Encounters Past
The Coconut Water Caper
“Did you enjoy my coconut water last night?” the pale, stubbled bartender asked with the rage and brazenness that a… Read more The Coconut Water Caper
The Traveling Salesman
The traveling salesman needed another fix. What was he selling, exactly? Himself. Or rather, whatever version of himself he currently… Read more The Traveling Salesman
Target, Toilette
Jillian was under the impression that, like Nancy Spungen, she had learned how to handle her hangovers. She had perfected… Read more Target, Toilette
The Drunk Dial: A Symbol of Love & Suppression Bubbled to the Surface
I couldn’t tell you the first time I drunk dialed someone. It wasn’t in high school, and it wasn’t in… Read more The Drunk Dial: A Symbol of Love & Suppression Bubbled to the Surface
The Mole
It’s strange when you’re younger and you feel like you might never find someone else to love you besides your… Read more The Mole
Crying on a Train to New Haven
What more romantic getaway could there be than New Haven in the fall? At least, by United States getaway standards,… Read more Crying on a Train to New Haven
If You’re A Bird, I’m A Bird–Except You Didn’t Want Me to Be
Whether a girl wants to admit it or not, the pinnacle of the modern romance movie remains The Notebook–perhaps the… Read more If You’re A Bird, I’m A Bird–Except You Didn’t Want Me to Be
Walked Home Sobbing Again
I will not doom myself to repeat the same mistakes, to engage in the same behavior, Hazel insists to herself as… Read more Walked Home Sobbing Again
